Gettin' In Trouble
I still remember the first, and really only time, I got in trouble at school. I was thinking about it because of Paul's post about when he was a Patrol for I was a patrol too (you can read about that in his comments). But thinking about the patrolling made me think back to 5th grade when the one time I got in real trouble.
Back then there was a disciplinary program called "checks" where every time you screwed up, you got a check. If you got 4 checks your ass was down in the office in a little claustrophobia-inducing room for a whole day by yourself and your parents were called. You could get checks for either homework or behavior. But fortunately for us all, the homework checks were kept separate from behavior (I'd have been truly screwed if it were otherwise).
Now it was possible to get all 4 checks for the same thing, but it had to be something really bad like cussin' or fighting. Now back in 5th grade everyone was in the whole "Oh I'm an adult now. I can cuss all I want" while we meanwhile played jump rope or generic stupid little kid stuff like "gettin' married". Now there was this one girl named Sasha* and I hated this girl with a passion. She was one of those prepy "I'm better then you, and you are the dirt beneath my shoe" type people... she was also a tattletale. So one day, on the play ground I was sitting on the steps gossiping with a couple of my other friends and Sasha came up to me and did her generic hair-pull and push and sent me tumbling down the steps. I didn't do anything like normal, just brushed myself off and sat back down a couple steps lower (since she of course sat in my spot). And she started bad mouthing my best friend who had a different recess. Now I mean seriously, the girl she was badmouthing was closer then my sister (actually remained so until she moved in 8th grade), and I was getting pissed. Finally when Sasha started bad mouthing me in front of my face I got pissed and just yelled at her "Sasha, why don't you go shut the f*** up and stick your face in horse dung! It might improve things!"
Sasha went and told the teacher, and I got hauled down to the assistant principal’s office. And oh let me tell you, they were pissed, cause incidentally enough... I was the Patrol Captain. But I guess either they all agreed with me when I said Sasha started it, and they shared my dislike of her (she was one of those annoying people that you just want to slap every time they open their mouths) because they went easy on me. Unlike most kids who were in "check-duty" from 9am-3:55pm, I had mine on a Thursday... a half day. It sucked, but not as bad as I expected.
The funniest thing is that the referral actually had it written out. They didn't put something cutesy on the "reason for disciplinary action" line, no, the teacher put "Rachael told Sasha to "shut the f*** up." I used to have it still... I wonder where it got to.. I need to get that framed.
*named changed not because I care, but because I can't spell the real name